on the way home tonight, all i wanted to do was come home and go to sleep, because i'm exhausted (again). it was a struggle to make it all the way to my final bus stop without falling asleep. but i'm a trooper. all i had to do was walk the final 7 blocks and i'd be home, but as i crossed broadway, i noticed a bunch of unmarked police cars, and a set of cones blockading the road south. there was one other person who got off at the same stop, and as we began our way down the street, a policeman came out of one car and asked us where we were going. the other guy answered first, saying he was going to his apartment.
"this one right here?"
"nope, the next one down."
"sorry sir, you can't go there right now. there's a man with a gun on the balcony and no one's allowed near there."
at this point, the guy who lived there started exclaiming how he knew he should have reported the gunman earlier because of things he'd overheard earlier in the week -- arguments and yelling but all in the same voice, bangs and crashes, things worthy of noise complaints. but the cop explained that they'd all been sitting around there for 6 hours now, trying to calm him down and bring him with them, or at least to relinquish the gun, i guess.
at this point he realised that me and otherdude weren't together, and asked me where i was going. after i told him, he told me that i could go through, but just walk on the other side of the road. so off i went, crossing the street, but as i walked by and saw a troop of bulletproofed cops walking back from the building, i looked up at the top balcony and saw the guy there looking out, presumably at the cops, i hope. and suddenly it dawned on me how close he was, and how i could see the gun in his hand, and fortunately it was at his side but it wouldn't take much for him to lift it up and point it at me, and would the giant umbrella i had with me seem like a target or something, and if this guy really was a little on the crazy side, how good would his aim be, and would he actually shoot at me, and would he be more likely to shoot at me if i was walking on his side of the street, and how i was beginning to feel like he was watching me, and is his hand still hanging down, or has he lifted it up now, i can't really tell, and . . .
i was walking pretty quickly at that point, just to get away from that scene. but after that rush of adrenaline and anxiety, so much for going straight to bed tonight.