Sunday, December 31, 2006

i am sick. my grand accomplishments today have included:
- drinking 7 cups of tea.
- proving to myself that all food tastes mediocre at best when i'm ill.
- letting the cat in and out 5 times. he leads an exciting life.
- completing 3/4 of a samurai sudoku puzzle. i haven't made a mistake yet.
- reading another few chapters of The Master and Marguerita. which continues to be awesome.
- catching up on 3.5 tv series, thanks to my new favourite online full-episode-uploaded video site. even though one show was bittorrented. and the .5 is because it was just watching the UK Office Christmas Special. which was heartwarming. and awkward. wonderful.
- briefly working on that whole learning-cyrillic thing. briefly. i now can read 2 more of the names posted on various pieces of furniture in my home.

of the tv shows i've been watching, the big themes have been:
- i wish i were special and unique.
- i'm on a quest to save the world. by which i mean everyone, everywhere, everyhow.
- i wish i was just like everyone else. fuck this special and unique crap.
- i don't need to change the world in big ways, i can do it just by being me.
- everything emotionally valuable in life can be crossrelated to sports.

of those five aforementioned points, four intrigue me because they're the ones from the recent shows. and they're the ones from the shows that everyone is raving about lately. and they all seem to be revolving around a similar theme about being yourself and changing the world. and it's kinda surprising how much the shows seem to bludgeon viewers over the head with those themes. it's like there's some crisis going on in general north american society that all the shows seems to be gravitating towards, focusing on that in order to appeal to audiences. and apparently it's working. and while i'm not able to really compare it to too many shows, i somehow don't recall seeing it (at least not as obviously) in series from bygone years (like 1998). maybe it's because Internet is so nice as to have created spaces where you can watch show after show after show. but somehow, i don't think i'd be getting the same messages out of watching The X-Files or MacGyver one after the other.

as for the sports references, i don't agree. but i'm going along with it for the sake of lazy entertainment.

so the first four points intrigue me and my sick little mind. very sick. sicker than i was a couple days ago, before i get mocking comments about me faking my sickness.

[though i am beginning to lose my voice. which adds to the sexy. but then that whole sick thing detracts megapoints. you sick-ist haters.]

and even though i'm enjoying most of the shows that i've been watching, i'm still hyperaware of how contrived they are, and even as they tug at my interest/excitement/curiousity/heartstrings, i'm busy looking at how and why they're succeeding, and wondering who the audience really is, and what they're looking for in life and what they're missing and wondering if these shows are somehow reaching out to fill those voids in other viewers too, and wondering if those voids are really a pattern for our era. and even as i figure out how they're manipulating me, i'm perfectly happy to be suckered into watching the next episode. and the next. and the next. it's just a shame that north american tv has this desire to drag out success until it dies, rather than just working with the whole "miniseries" genre, leaving the audience maybe a little wanting, but satisfied.

it's quantity, not quality! wait, what?

here's what i would like. i'd like to see choreographed interactions tomorrow. and music playing to add dramatic ambiance (kinda like what happened with devin last week). and really really good chai tea. and a surprise visitor bringing me chicken soup. and maybe, just maybe, the sort of meaningful-with-a-future-but-at-the-same-time-so-trite interactions with strangers in a cafe, the kind that litter televisionland but never quite seem to happen in real life. i'm not sure if it's because we imagine they exist in our fantasy worlds, which translates into our so-called "entertainment", or if it's because once upon a time life did work like that, until it sorta died out over the last couple decades, but tvland, being that bizarre vortex that it is, never quite caught up to the 21st century, at least in that respect.

and i'd really, really like my ears to pop. because that's the most annoying part of being sick right now.

in other news, my juggling skills have improved, but that's saying little considering that they didn't exist two days ago; i have a couch to sleep on for my first few nights in morocco; and i think solomon's losing weight. maybe. gotta wait for karl to come back because he'll be able to tell me for sure, what with being away for a week. but perhaps solo will be able to fit into last year's jeans afterall!

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