Wednesday, December 07, 2005

today's been st niklaus day. so happy st niklaus day.

if i'd been living in coquitlam, or if i'd been in germany, my shoe would have been outside my door overnight and today i'd have had gifts left for me.

but i'm not. and all i had when i woke up was two papers to write.

but they're done now. which means that all the schoolwork for this semester is done. two 1600 word papers, due the same day, the first day after all other classes end. as much as i love this prof, that's just a little harsh.

but they're done now. and the title for each one went on two lines. and there was a period at the end of each. they would have been ironic if i'd been able to think straight when they were done. as it was, doing a filmography was messier than it should have been. but the marker doesn't need to know that. because on paper, it all looks perfect. now.

cuz they're done now. and i went over on each one by just a little, because that's what happens. well, now it does. a few years ago i'd reach 50 words short of the total and send that off because it was good enough. now i have at least 250 words extra, no matter how long it's supposed to be, and have to struggle to edit it down. go figure.

but they're done now. as i was writing them, i realised how well i play the pronoun game these days. i don't do it consciously anymore. when i speak, i think i've totally adopted using gender-neutral pronouns. but when it's written, sometimes that doesn't work, grammatically. but instead of just putting in a "him or herself" or something bogus like that, i went and reworded the sentence so that it wasn't even necessary. so that "the filmmaker" or "audiences'" can be in there instead. i just never realised how much i did it before.

but they're done now. and one of them has a paragraph that i'm rather proud of. it has character. and spirit. and maybe even holiday cheer. but not like christmas. like, oomph. and that essay ends with a question mark. yes, a question mark. i'm daring like that. or maybe just cocky. or maybe just tired. i bet when the marker reads it they won't read it with the wink and the smile like they're supposed to. but those are the risks i take. i'm crazy like that.

and they're done now!

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