Wednesday, January 26, 2005

there was sunshine today.

it was warm enough to be in a t-shirt.

i skipped my second class in 2 weeks. this doesn't bode well for the future. hopefully Galacticontoniomojoba went, because my other class contact skipped, too.

we pretended to do ballet today. i learned that i can only dream of ever actually being coordinated and graceful. s'alright. i came to terms with being a klutz years ago.

i don't think that i'll ever overcome my fear of shots or needles taking away my blood. every time my fear and freakouts just get worse. the anticipation of the whole thing is probably to blame. i'm sure it provides some sort of amusement for the nurses, though. still, she didn't have to show my that they were taking 7 vials of blood today, because even though i'm skinny enough that the blood loss alone probably explains a lot of my mood today, the mental stress of the whole ordeal probably only added to it.

and i get to do more in another week or so! huzzah! but it's only 2 vials then. and a tetanus shot around the same time, too. though anyone and everyone who punches my arm the day after will deserve whatever payback i give them.

still, i have to admit that the break that came of indulging in my own exhaustion and fears was lovely. got out of class, skipped tutoring, excused meself of any guilt of spending time talking to people rather than being productive.

that said, i still want aerin to add to my tattoo. because that's a whole other mental construct, but one that doesn't touch the whole phobia section of my brain at all. might make no sense to you. your loss.

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